If your child went missing, presumed abducted, would you be able to act calm and collected...?

Question

if you were told that to show your real emotions would give the abductor the thrill they are looking for? Would you have the strength of character to preserve normality for any other children you have in your care?

In private, of course, you could still give in to the storm of emotions you would no doubt be feeling, but in public you must remain cool and carry on. Could you do it?

Your thoughts?

Answer 1

If someone, presumably an expert in such cases, told me that 'acting calm & collected' would somehow help in finding my precious child, by not giving the abductor the 'thrill' it is looking for.... i swear i would muster every ounce of energy & courage to ACT (not be) calm & collected.



Deep within, of course, i would be a complete wreck...as missing childrens' parents must surely be in the privacy of their home.

Answer 2

Initially I'd lose the plot completely but if appearing strong and together was what the experts told me would help my child most then that's what I would do but it wouldn't be easy.Maybe them being doctors helped.Traumatic situations would not have been new to them.Being a heart surgeon requires a calmness and self assurance that most people would not normally have.They both come across as quite logical types.

Answer 3

I would be jelly and crazy. I'm not a parent, but I think I would have to find the courage to get on with life as normally as possible for the sake of my other children.



That means going jogging to stay fit for the task in hand and staying as calm as I can for them, as well as taking advantage of all publicity and opportunity, no matter how people perceive that to be.

Answer 4

I would be in a right panic. I would follow the instructions of the police. I wouldn't obstruct police by phoning Sky news and blowing the whole thing all over the world news media. I wouldn't employ publicists or use the problem to raise money to pay my mortgage with.



Phew, fielding these McCann related questions from Skidoo has been hard work over the last few weeks, but hey someone's got to do it, I don't mind giving my time up for free.

Answer 5

No I couldn't. I 'lost' my daughter (she walked off while I was getting the baby out of the car) and I went absolutely crazy, jesus, I do not wish that on anyone. She was found relatively quickly, thank god, goodness, did that teach me a lesson.

The thing is, now that I am thinking about this: by the time you get to be in that position (TV cameras, police), quite some time would've passed.

i probably would not be in hysterics but I'm not sure about calm and collected.

I'm not sure if it's a strength of character to preserve normality: it's not normal if one of your children is missing and I think the other kids should be aware of that too.

Answer 6

I don't understand how the parents of Madeleine Mc can can act as calm as they do! There child was abducted in a foreign country and you rarely see them show emotion in the media. I know they were told to keep calm so the abductor doesn't get the thrill they are looking for! but surely if your child was abducted and with all the media attention you would break down in front of everyone?



Personally no I couldn't do it - I would break down! But I pray that I never go through the experience of having a child close to me abducted.



x

Answer 7

If it was to help my child I would try very hard to be calm

and collected. Somehow I don't think I am that strong.

I certainly couldn't put my earings, bracelet and necklace

on for the cameras. I also doubt I would be able to better

my jogging times while she was missing.

But hey ho that's just me.

Answer 8

I agree with Missy. My 2 year old daughter went missing once for about half an hour.

The sheer blind panic and terror i felt in that 30 mins was horrific.

To act as calm and cool as the McCanns have done shows enormous strength of character.



If i was been assured that everything that could be done, was being done and that for her sake I had to keep calm in public, then I think I could do it.

But I hope I never have to.

Answer 9

I think you would feel so empty and numb, that's how you would appear. No-one knows how they would truly feel or act if not in that position. I think the frustration and anger would be directed toward the incompetent and negligent police investigators.

Answer 10

i know i could not do it, i would be a complete wreck my emotions would just take over.but eventually you have to try to pull yourself together for the sake of your other children, i would most likely be bombed out my head on prozac just so i could keep going

Answer 11

You know, the McCanns go on all these shows and act somewhat strangely. How come nobody ever analises their body language or attempts to psychologically profile them. Why not, I saw a programme that did this in great detail with Karen Mathews, but with the McCanns it's hands off kid glove treatment all the time

Answer 12

I don't think I'd be able to act 'normal' in any way, shape or form.



Just the blind panic I felt on losing sight of my youngest for ten seconds in the supermarket gave me enough of a jolt to know I'd be anything but cool, calm and collected.



No, there's no way I could do it.

Answer 13

My 3 year old son let my 18 month old son into the back garden yesterday while I was in the bathroom - for the 2 minutes I had to search for him I was frantic - I wouldn't have the strength.



I admire anyone who could though. Kate and Gerry McCann are much stronger people than I am.

Answer 14

im not sure,but my sons 6ft 6 and 25 stone would the kidnappers mother be worried?.

Answer 15

No, i would be a wreck,mentally and physically, i think its a normal reaction for a parent to have,god help anyone who did anything to my child i would kill to save their life.

Answer 16

the McCanns are very religious and the very religious tend to act differently in those types of situations.



perhaps they saw what happens as "god's will" or that "god would return their daughter in time" that might be one plausible explanation for some of the McCanns strangeness in public!

Answer 17

I don't know as I never lost a child

Answer 18

and go for my daily jog?

and play tennis, set up a blog, jet around the world meeting celebrity's and dignitary's, politicians and pontiff's?



or would i turn to dust inside, numb with fear about my baby girl?



my baby girl is now 25, and happily married, doesn't stop me worrying about her though





edit

my three year old daughter has been abducted and i have to maintain my normal daily Rhythm?, my life would never be the same again

Answer 19

You wouldn't have a choice. You could live for another 50, 60, 70 years. Are you meant to go mad and lose control of your senses? Are you meant to make life impossible for your other children?

Answer 20

That is a question neither you or i can answer as we have never experienced a child being abducted.